3.22.2013

気晴らしに一人チャリ漕ぎ、近くの公園で人工湖や桜を見てのんびり。
就活やら悩みは一切考えず〜。Facetimeで相方とも話し、少し気が楽になった！
よし、ほんじゃ〜バイト行ってくるか〜。

Tough spring

Spring has come. Becoming warm. My nose and eyes are crying, because of pollens.

The rhubarbs are growing again, which makes me a bit excited. Flowers bloom, new leaves grow.

That's what I like about spring, but basically I start feeling dull, have pollen-allergy symptoms, and

many small bugs become active in spring, so I don't really like spring. Oh gosh, yes, and I've started

 my job-hunting this spring. This already kills my nerves, but I will do my best coz I basically really wanna

work as full-timer. Surely one of the damn tiring tough times in my life. It's tougher when I am in a depressing

period. Well, I just hope this tough hunting period will soon be over. 

Wearing suits, go to companies, and having interviews, going to school, working part-time, studying at home,

eating, sleeping and shitting. Sounds like I'm living.. right? sigh  

Getting to be our family member

Impulsive?

 Yeah, guess so....but

these are anyway what I have wanted, so don't feel regret about the shopping.
Well, just, oh, something's wrong with me now. Dead.

Losing myself

There are too many things to have in my heart and brain, but I cannot make any words to release

all of them from there. Just piling up piling up piling up. I don't have any energies to go to school, 

go to work, do things, have conversations with people, think normally. I don't even know what I am.
Ha.. I've been tired of feeling like this for years..  I might need tranquilizers again.
That couldn't be the solution to kill these feelings even if I got tranquilizers, though.
I didn't expect that I would become a loser when I was little. Funny.      

First snow in 2013

久々の更新が自分の好きな雪のことで幸せです！朝寝てた時はまだ屋根に雨の当たる音が聞こえてたのに、

数時間してその音も聞こえなくなったから外見たら静かなはずですね。雪が深々と降ってました。

雪が降ってる景色や一面銀世界の景色、歩きにくいけど雪を踏みしめた時の感覚、静寂。あーー！

 雪好きな私にとっては最高な日でした。雪と霧が天気の中で一番好きと言っても過言ではありません。

一日中マイナスの気温のスウェーデンなどとは違うので、残念ながら途中から雨に変わってしまいましたが。 

私の住む地域はパウダースノーじゃなくて湿っぽいんで、雪を踏んだ時の音はパウダーとは違いますね。

また関東でも降ってほしい！！！